It hurt my soul to have to step away from writing. I no longer had the mental capacity to go back to my hold writing habits. I no longer had the energy to put into something I love.

"Honestly, when and after life comes at you hard, healing is difficult. In the beginning you believe that you will always feel like you're in a pit of despair."

This is a bit of a personal essay for me to other writers to see, read, and identify with. I am writing to say that I am not out of this storm—I’m still in the middle of it. It’s just the winds have lessened and rain stings my skin a little less. I’ve got the help I’ve needed from professionals and I’m still working on it.

At the beginning of the year I was at point where I wasn’t sure what was next for me in my writing journey. I never thought I would get to a point where I considered shelfing my novel Torque.

And I don't want to quit. Torque has been my heart and soul. Falling in love with it with every change and I just can't figure out why it's so hard. 

At the beginning of the year, I knew I wanted to take time out for my writing and get away. I wanted to experience a new environment and get the creative juices flowing. I had in my mind that what I’ve dubbed to everyone as “my solo writing retreat,” would result in a finished book and things would go smoothly as I am preparing for the Writer's Digest Conference in August.Well, that wasn’t quite the case....